How are you this Christmas, puffed up and ho-ho-ho as usual I suppose. I have never seen you even though mummy says you’re real, you don’t reply my letters, don’t take my calls, and you do not even grant me my wishes. What kind of Santa are you? You let mummy die of cancer, now I got no mummy. Daddy doesn’t believe in you, he says you’re just in my head as a myth, nothing more, nothing less, I don’t believe him and I don’t believe mummy instead. Daddy said I am sick, I think it is cancer too, I take too many drugs, too many therapy, I go to the hospital too often, even now, I am writing from the consultant’s table, and yet you do not show up. I know I will not live long enough, but please come, so I can laugh again, I cannot remember laughing since mummy went away.
Today, I will be 5, Doctor Anne said I will not reach 8, do you believe her? well I don’t, she doesn’t know what they call miracle, but I do. Miracle did not work on mummy, but it will work on me, because I have faith, faith like Moses had, Like Daniel had in the Lion’s den, Like Jesus had. I got a gift for you too, come and pick it up, and when you come, here is my wish for you to grant;
– I want you to give daddy a new family, he will be alone very soon, give him a new mummy and a new me, no cancer of course, just love.
– I want Terry to have a new friend, you know he is weird, and nobody likes him but me, I think he is funny even if he smells like old garlic, but I like him, and he likes me.
– I want to go to heaven when I die, to see Baby Jesus, and King David, and Queen Esther, mummy reads their story to me every night, but she is not here with me anymore, but I know she is in heaven with them, so and mummy.
That will be all for now till next year, but when your coming, make sure daddy doesn’t see you, okay?
Have a merry Christmas Santa. I love you.
This is a fiction letter in dedication to the little angel in that picture, her name is not Mary, I had to give her a name, somehow I wish I met her, so beautiful and full of life, her smiles are charming, I fell in love with her just staring at the picture, her beautiful eyes, too sad the fight ended early, also I dedicate this to all those who did not survive the cold hands of cancer. Love, Ruth.